Saturday, November 28, 2009

Back down...

Apparently, I was too optimistic and relieved to return to any semblance of normalcy. I've been experiencing more back pain today than I've had for a few days. Not as bad as a week ago, but still hindering. It hadn't gone away completely at all, but it had become much more manageable and tolerable.

I really hope it wasn't the kitchen time on Thursday or the semi-laundry I did yesterday that put me back in this position. I mean, I didn't even fold the clothes yesterday; I merely washed and dried them, which does entail a bit of bending, I admit, but Christ on a bike, it isn't like I decided to go run a marathon yesterday.

I'm inclined to believe it was my attempt to bring the Christmas decorations upstairs this morning that sent things back over the edge. I've decided to try some back stretches to see if that helps at all. One can hope, right?

This has just gotten super duper frustrating, feeling as though I am less of a whole person, unable to do the simple things I usually do every day. It's a good thing we still have tons of leftovers (and that the boys LOVE turkey and mashed potatoes) because the thought of standing in the kitchen to prepare a meal creates a worried furrow on my brow, like I may collapse or cry before it can be done. It pains me to no end to have to tell LMX that I can't pick him up. Gosh, how I took for granted all the times I was able to effortlessly lift my baby son into my arms for a snuggle-y hug. No movement is easy, and it makes me sad and solemn. I'm also fighting the useless moments of worry that this is something I will be dealing with forever.

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