Thursday, March 01, 2007

When my world was still untainted...


The warm, Memphis-in-July air was flowing through the screen door. The sun was shining brightly through the windows, creating pale amber stripes on the floor. The sky was clearly giving beauty to the crayon named, "sky blue".

Everything was calm and relaxed. I puttered through the house, knowing Sarah and Josh shouldn't take too long to come over so we could start the party.

That cake! I could hardly wait to taste it. Where did she find it? It's so different. Who knew frosting could look so weird? I love Cookie Monster!

The square, folding-leg table they used for late night card games with the neighbors was covered by a white table cloth and had birthday paper plates with some napkins, forks, and cups. Not many, though, because there weren't many of us. The only true decoration on that table was the Cookie Monster cake. The brilliant, truly Cookie-Monster blue wasn't even a shade off, and somehow the frosting actually looked like it was shaved off the back-side of that famous Sesame Street muppet. His eyes were big, round, and precisely askew. And, those two giant chocolate chip cookies shoved in the mouth, half in and half out? Perfection.

............................................................

That cake was given to me on my 7th birthday. The memory of that cake is so clear to me, and I remember it being one of the happiest memories of my childhood. This post by fringes today had me recalling that day once again, as I have so many times when people recall fond moments from their childhoods. I never really gave much thought as to why that cake stands out so much for me, why it is permanently displayed in my "happy thoughts" section of my brain. I can't really recall if I even loved Cookie Monster so much before that day, but I know that I have always loved him since. I believe I have finally figured out why that day was special enough to create that lasting impression.

At 7 years-old my mom and dad were together, happily together it seemed. They had fights, but the fights hadn't gotten violent yet, at least not in my presence. Our dog didn't limp from his hip-joint replacement because he hadn't been thrown across the room into a wall by my father. My mom was perfect; she hadn't gotten to the point in physical suffering that she had to go to the hospital for a hysterectomy, during which I cried and worried more than I knew I could because the hospital and surgery were scary things that didn't always turn out alright. My dad was just my dad; he hadn't yet decided to teach me about his anatomy or intimate interactions between males and females, things I was not allowed to tell anyone else about.

By my 8th birthday, none of those things were still true.

8 comments:

fringes said...

What a nice post. Of course, you could have typed this entire thing into my comments, and it would have been all good.

fringes said...

Wait...I just finished reading the whole thing. This will teach me to comment-while-skimming. It feels rather bittersweet, doesn't it: the mixing of feelings about your 7th birthday knowing what was to come. Life is such a trial. You've done a great job of making it worth living.

Celebrate Woo-Woo said...

Until I made the comment on your post, I hadn't even thought about the rest. By the time I did, I figured it'd make a decent use of this space for the day;>

It is very odd now that I think I know why that memory has been so important to me. Bittersweet was exactly how I felt about it by the time I wrote this, remembering how this memory always makes me feel so warm and happy and now realizing the likely reason it makes me feel that way is because so many things in my life changed afterwards.

Ariel said...

I love the new header picture, btw..

BeckyD said...

What a very powerful, raw post. Wow. That's honest, and it's brave, and I am in awe that you wrote it, and at how far you seem to have come from that point.

And yes, I love the header picture too.

wow.

Celebrate Woo-Woo said...

ariel - Thanks. I think I've finally gotten to a point of liking what's up at the top of this blog, too;>

beckyd - That is why I love blogging. It feels good to be able to just put random thoughts down in writing and let them stay there. If these thoughts were left unwritten, they would've still been swirling around in my head last night and probably still today.

briliantdonkey said...

Wow, Powerful post to say the least. Both in a good heartwarming way and gutwrenching way as well. Very Brave as someone else said to say the least. This will sound a bit corny, but I am glad you went on to become the things you are in spite of him.

BD

Celebrate Woo-Woo said...

bd - Thank you.