Sunday, March 26, 2006

Skyqueen, how could he be any better?

Since I know how much she loves Sex and the City, I had to post about this.

NS downloaded and burned copies of all the Sex and the City seasons for me. It was his thoughtful, "just because" gift to me yesterday;> He actually seriously considered buying the collector's set for me but figured the $200 or so price was a bit much considering it wasn't even something I asked for and he could just as easily make it himself...I completely agree with that reasoning.

Can't say my boy doesn't know what it's like to wear heels...

I've definitely got future blackmail material here;>
Image hosting by Photobucket

Saturday, March 25, 2006

Working, using phone once again, not pregnant, and whatever else has been going on...

I began my new job on Monday. So far, so good. The people seem really great and the atmosphere and attitude is very similar to my last position, which was wonderful...low stress and independent. I'm still limited on some things since I can't access certain systems and folders yet, so it will still take some more time for me to really get into things around there. I did find out that we only get paid once a month...not so terrible, right? Well, pay day is the 26th of each month, and since I just started on the 20th, I didn't make the cut-off for this month...I'm not going to see a paycheck until April 26th!

But...good news is that the sales contract on my FL house is due to close on Monday, so I will have that little nest egg pretty soon, so waiting another month to get a paycheck won't be completely awful.

I am no longer living with any parental units. As of last night, my mom and her husband are living together again. I think the separation made him realize that he wasn't paying enough attention, and as sad as it may be, the craziness that he exhibited after her departure made her realize that he does care about her and love her...he just wasn't demonstrating it the way she needed him to.

NS didn't get off his boat on Monday as we'd thought he would...he didn't get back until the original day they told him, which was Thursday. So, Thursday night, I was reunited with my phone.

Some things that make him so sweet:

Before he had to leave last time, he sent me a text message about being disappointed he couldn't see the boys again before he had to go. He had seen them the day before, taken us to dinner and even hung out until they went to bed before he drove his friend back home, but he was still disappointed about not being able to see them again before he went away for a week or so. The boys' actual father didn't even bother to see them or say goodbye before he moved to another state.

And last night he washed dinner dishes for me, cleaned the table and thoroughly cleaned the placemats, changed M for bed (diaper and clothes), and even went in to calm them down while I was on the phone with my mom-out-law (ex MIL)...then he spent a solid 30-45 minutes massaging my feet. For IFKAMH to have done all those things without my having to ask for a single one of them would probably have made me wonder what alien had taken over his body. Not that IFKAMH was completely unhelpful, but for him to have stepped in and taken care of that amount of stuff that has to be done each night without being asked was not something I ever recall him doing. So, NS earned some major brownie points with me last night;>

I did start my period right on schedule last week, so no new additions to my family...whew;> No more skipping any months of birth control regardless of whether or not someone is supposed to be in town the whole month or not.

And I can't let this one go without saying something...just can't, too silly of a comment for anyone who might not be checking posts back that far. Regarding the Nepharious Two comment: Yep, you've got me all figured out...I spent an entire day tracking down some place to spend $42 on emergency birth control because I'm trying to get "knocked up". By the way, I of all people know that having a child with someone sure as hell doesn't "trap" them into sticking around...have you not read anything on this blog about IFKAMH?!?

Finally, I have found my camera! Foot Fetish posts will resume shortly, and to The Big Cheese, as well as anyone else that might have wondered: I started that blog because of a shoe post on this blog a while back that generated more comments than any of my other posts had at that time...I really do love shoes, and I figured some other people might enjoy seeing my collection.

Friday, March 17, 2006

Family...

IFKAMH's grandmother is dying from cancer. She has cancer in her bones, and liver, and pancreas. It is unlikely that she will live another six months. IFKAMH's mother was pestering me about taking pictures of the boys to send to her before it was too late. As we all know, I haven't located my camera since the move. So, last weekend, I bought a disposable camera, and spent a few days taking pictures of the boys. Some of them were pretty darn cute. Most others were alright, but I could have sworn they had some big grins on when I shot that, especially since I tried four times to get smiles. And finally, I got someone else to take the picture so that I would be in it. That is always one of the big complaints from her when I send pics, that I'm never in any of them. So, here is the family photo, including Big Dog;>

Image hosting by Photobucket

I can't believe I did that...

NS found out Monday, after not getting into the class that he waited all morning to get into, that he was going back out to sea with his boat on Tuesday. He basically got really screwed over on Monday after getting really used to the idea of having an easy couple weeks ahead of him without having to be on his boat. Anyway, so I went out to see him Monday night while he got ready to leave since he had unpacked and cleaned everything that he had with him the first time after he was told he wouldn't be going back out again. He left at 5:15 in the morning on Tuesday (or somewhere around there) and let me sleep, which I did...until 6:30 so that I would be home for my boys when they woke up. So, I leave his house and lock up behind me because both of his roommates are out at sea and no one will be there for the next 6 days. Well, the problem is that I used my phone as my alarm clock and left it there instead of sticking it back in my purse before I left. Now, I have no phone. I don't know people's phone numbers to call them and tell them this. I used email to let some people know, especially my realtor since the inspection was done on my house Wednesday...the same day that I would try to break in to his house and retrieve my phone;> I researched picking locks online that morning and gave it a shot...unsuccessfully.

It was the middle of the afternoon, and there were all kinds of cars and people in his neighborhood; I thought someone might call the cops on me if I tried for too long. I attempted to pick the lock of the back door with a safety pin and a screwdriver (as read on someone's website) but had no luck (or course, this process is not supposed to be that easy the first time around...I wasn't going to spend an hour or two trying to pick this lock knowing that the neighbors were around, though), and so I examined the windows to see if there was one that looked unlocked. There were a couple that seemed to be unlocked, so I tried to get in. One had a very stubborn screen that would not move up no matter how hard I tried, and the other, the one that I managed to lift the screen far enough up for me to slip into the house, turned out to actually be a locked window;> I decided against breaking a window since that would surely alert the neighbors' suspicions to the fullest, and I really can't afford to replace a window right now, so I will have to make do until Monday when he gets back.

I still had to figure out how to get in contact with him to let him know that my phone was still at his house, though, because by Monday (in fact, by yesterday) my battery would be dead, so calling my phone wouldn't work. Sadly, I had no idea what his phone number was other than the area code. Who can waste precious memory space on phone numbers when they just get saved into my phone?!? I realized, however, that I have called him and received calls from him quite often, so the number would be on my phone bill;> I looked up the number and called him to leave him a voicemail last night. I also used his carrier's website to send him a text message. Hopefully, he'll check those soon after he gets back, and I'll be able to return to normal communication.

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Didn't expect that (not really anyway)...

I received a very interesting message at a little after three this morning...from IFKAMH's girlfriend.

I hear the ring for a text/pix message on my phone. I had just gotten to sleep about 5 minutes before, and this woke me up in a bit of a daze because I rarely ever get messages from anyone other than NS, and he was sleeping right next to me, so it wasn't from him. I look at my phone and see that it is a message from her. I open my phone to read the messaage (I had assumed it was simply a text message), and I receive a picture of a newborn baby...a girl named Lillian with IFKAMH's (as well as mine and my boys') last name born 3/3 according to the message. She writes that she didn't know if I already knew and that she didn't want to upset me (somehow I don't believe that part) but that he has just not been truthful with her at all (join the club, girl) and to feel free to call if I want. She ends the message with the statement that she will not bother me again.

I turn to NS and show him my phone and say that it is my children's half-sister. He may or may not actually remember this because I'm not sure if he was actually awake. I said something about that blowing IFKAMH's claim about not having slept with her right out of the water, which I then had to explain to NS what I meant by out of the water (this is probably the most compelling reason for me to think that he was not actually awake during this conversation). I told him it meant that it is now obvious that he has slept with her (although I never believed his claim that he didn't...see january 31st post) and he can't hide it anymore.

My response to her was that I would call later and thanked her for letting me know but that I had already moved on and so was not at all upset. I did call her this afternoon, but got her voicemail. I left a message to indicate that I am sorry IFKMAH is the way he is (regardless of her blame for any of the situation, it shouldn't happen to anyone) and that I would be encouraging IFKAMH to stay where he is and be a real father for his daughter. I feel that is the best thing I can do. As if I didn't already believe it, I cannot see how IFKAMH's involvement in my boys' lives could be good, especially since it seems he has not become a better person and is definitely nothing like the kind of man I want my children to become. We are fine without him and will continue to be fine without him; I feel he has a chance to do things right this time and should take that opportunity rather than try to run away from her. That little girl will be so much better off if she can have a decent father, which I feel IFKAMH could be if he actually set out to be one.

Friday, March 10, 2006

Not much to say today, so here are my charming boys...

I apologize for poor quality, but these are taken from my phone.

Post-bathtime pics (these are my favorite of all their hooded towels;>)

J
Image hosting by Photobucket

M
Image hosting by Photobucket

Both
Image hosting by Photobucket

Would not go outside without the shades yesterday;>

J
Image hosting by Photobucket

M
Image hosting by Photobucket

Thursday, March 09, 2006

Better news....

I will officially begin working again on the 20th. Hopefully I will enjoy this job. It's odd that so many people are fed up with their jobs (poor Danielle is about ready to go postal on her employer), or are at least wishing something was different (like my mom stressing over the fact that her job is strictly commission-based and unreliable), and I'm actually feeling good about this prospect. The pay was more than what I needed (although a bit lower than I thought they would offer after researching the salaries for that job title in this area) and more than I was making with my last job, so I feel like I've taken a step up, which is the best way to go. The only thing I have left to do is take a drug test today. I had planned to do that yesterday, but I had an offer on my FL house come in Tuesday night and spent the greater part of my afternoon yesterday getting faxes and reviewing/filling out paperwork and then faxing everything back so that she could fax it all to the buyer's realtor by 5pm. Around 4pm, though, another offer was made. This was a better offer as far as numbers are concerned, but both buyers are self-employed and are seeking 100% financing, so it may be more difficult for them to actually qualify, which means the contract may not go through. I told her to go ahead with accepting the first offer (although we did raise the price by a couple grand), so if they were alright with the changes we made to the price and the few other minor adjustments and fill-in-the-blanks that we actually filled in with numbers, then the sale of my house should close in the next few weeks, provided an inspection and appraisal gets completed fairly soon...and I will really be on my way to a new start;>

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Lessons learned yesterday...

* When going to the "free" clinic for emergency contraception, don't mention the fact that you have insurance...stick with the "no income" claim and ask how to prove it
* It is more financially sound to just take the regular pills in the first place, doubling up if necessary, than to have to pay for the Plan B pills
* Try harder to calcuate the date of your last cycle prior to letting intercourse without a condom begin

Apparently, NS has decided that we no longer need to use condoms. I was not consulted or even warned about this before it happened, but I was comfortable enough with the idea to not stop it. However, I didn't realize at the time (damn hard to think at that particular moment of dates and such) that it had actually been closer to two weeks than one since my last period, which means that my not taking the pills this month could definitely be a problem. Now, the reason I decided not to take my pills this month was because the prescription got filled a couple days after I was supposed to have it, and NS was supposed to be going to sea for about 6 weeks, so, since we've always used condoms, I opted to save my $40/month pills for next month. Well, as it turns out, NS won't be gone for 6 weeks, he's gone this week and possibly next, but he will even be here this weekend, and since the Plan B emergency contraception pills I had to track down yesterday after freaking out on Monday after realizing that it was damn near time for ovulation (and well, it didn't take much for me to get pregnant with twins the first time, so I figured it was best to do what I could to not get pregnant now) were $42, it would definitely have been better for me to have just take the couple days of double dosage to catch up and have actually been on birth control this month. Oh, that $42 was on top of the $12 I spent on 7 ovulation tests (the smallest package they had) to see if it would tell me if the chances for my getting pregnant were as realistic as I was thinking. That, by the way, was a waste of my money because those tests can only tell if you are about to ovulate in the next 24-72 hours, so if I'd already ovulated (very, very likely), then the test would still have been negative (as it was), but I could still quite possibly get pregnant that month. After taking the emergency contraception pills yesterday, my chances of getting pregnant this month have been reduced from 8% to about 1%, which is still not impossible...afterall, that was about the chances that I would have twins, too, but I'll try to have faith that I can't beat the odds all the time;>

My chant for the day...it is for the best

The SPCA I went to yesterday would not take LD after I told them what happened to bring me to the decision of surrendering him...no biters. They said I would have to quarantine him for 10 days and then take him to the vet to be euthanized. As if I wasn't already crying while I stood at the reception desk about to relenquish my munchkin puppy, the thought of having to sentence him to death for protecting me certainly sent me into a full-on sobbing session. Still sobbing, I call my mom at work to tell them what they told me, and she asked if I wanted her to call a different SPCA in the area to see if they would take him...omitting the biting incident. I said that sounded good. So, they agreed to take him this morning. I sat with him for about 20 minutes, crying and hugging him as I filled out paperwork about his background and personality. He has been surrendered for the reason of not getting along with children under 5, which is for the most part true. I don't necessarily think that he wouldn't get along with someone else's children, though; he just doesn't get along with anyone that takes my attention away from him. He is that dog, the one that weasels his way in between me and someone else...NS and I will lay on the couch, which is about all there is room for, so he crawls on top of us, and lays nestled right in between my back and NS's stomach. He's been very protective and attached to me for as long as I can remember. He actually nipped IFKAMH in the face while I was pregnant because he was making noises at my tummy, which LD must have determined to be a threat. This SPCA is a no-kill shelter, which set my mind at ease more than words can say because, like I said, I honestly don't think he will be as aggressive without me to protect, and he does deserve a good home. I am sad to think that I will not see him again (although they said I could call to check on him whenever I want, and they will let me know when he's been adopted, which they don't think will take very long because he is a small, cuddly dog), but I just have to realize that my flesh-and-blood children are more important, and I cannot knowingly put them at risk of being more seriously injured since it seems that LD's behavior is not going to stop or get better with more time...this is for the best, I know.

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

For the love and safety of my children...

One of my dogs, Little Dog (or Little Devil, as he has also been referred to, possibly a more fitting nickname, especially in light of recent events) will be leaving me today. Yesterday afternoon, he bit J in the face. I was sitting on the couch with M and J reading books, and LD was next to me. He kept making growling sounds under his breath whenever one of the boys, mostly J, went near him...and when J actually reached for his Nemo toy that was next to LD, he snapped and bit my baby in the face. He has nipped before, but this was just so aggressive and was done immediately after I had been telling him not to since I was concerned with his growling. I had done a good job of keeping J away from him, but he just moved so quickly to get his toy that I didn't even have a chance to stop him and keep him away from the dog. LD is not the best dog in the world (in fact, most people hate being around him because he barks at everyone, even people that he knows, until they pay attention to him and hold him), but I have had him since he was a puppy (almost 7 years), and he has his moments of total sweetness (like now, as he is curled up in my lap). Unfortunately, it is now quite obvious that he is too aggressively protective of me, even against my own children, so he cannot stay. I cried last night and am crying now at the realization that he will not be my dog anymore. Hopefully, he will find a home where there are no neighbors, children, or visitors to bother him and will have a peaceful life.

Circus...fun for boys, disappointing to me and NS

So, Saturday was the big circus day. I was all excited because I hadn't been to the circus in what seemed like forever, but it didn't live up to my expectations...apparently NS felt the same way. What I found most disappointing was the limited variety of animals. I seem to remember there being tigers and monkeys at the circus, but the most exotic thing at this circus were the elephants, even though they were gave a superb performance. In addition to the elephants were cats, dogs, birds, and horses. Other than that...all human circus acts.

So, even though NS and I were less than impressed, the boys seemed entertained enough despite not having listened to their mother tell them to take an early nap so that they would be well-rested for their afternoon adventure. J was still in naptime daze during the first act, but he was quiet and well-behaved, so no problem there, and he got more enjoyment during the second act after he fully woke up for a snack during intermission. I think his favorite people were the trapeze artists. M was totally enthralled during the first act. He clapped when everyone else clapped and just stared in amazement at everything going on, even standing on my lap at some points to get a better view. Of course, this meant that he lost some of his interest during intermission and didn't find the whole thing quite as captivating during the second act. I think he may have just wanted to get out of my lap to go join the circus, but he couldn't and was just a wiggle-worm. He really liked the jugglers, which was the first thing we saw. They juggled yellow hats, and he kept pointing at them and saying, "yellow". Being the daredevils they are, both were fascinated by the "ball of death" motorcycle show, which went from four to five to seven motorcycles spinning around each other...craziness;> Yes, I am a bad mother...I didn't find my camera before we left and so have no pictures to share of the first-time event, and NS didn't realize his camera's battery was practically dead because it showed full when he turned it on but dropped drastically with each of the possibly five pictures he managed to take, although some of those were probably pretty great.

As we were waiting in traffic after the circus, he mentioned that someone (I think his dad) told him he should go to Cirque Du Soleil if he wanted to see a good circus. I agreed that those shows are incredible and definitely a must-see.

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Dull moments can be a rare commodity...

Night before last was full of fun and mischief, but rather than have a mental breakdown, I decided I could do nothing but laugh...and share it with the blog world;>

My mom's dog is rather skittish and nervous most of the time. Her digestive system seems to have taken a toll from the move because she had diarrhea for several days after she came back to the apartment from the crazy house. She was going all the time but usually managed to keep it confined to my bathroom, although she didn't usually keep it on the vinyl floor but instead chose the rug and then the towels that replaced the rug while it was being washed.

So, night before last, she goes on the bathroom floor (I had abandoned the towel-replacing-rug idea in hopes of having easier clean-up) for the fourth or maybe fifth time that day, but I didn't realize this because I was trying to get the boys ready for a bath. I finally get them undressed and tell them to go in the bathroom to wait for me...they have washable markers in hand, by the way. I catch a glimpse of J covered in marker as I go into the dining room to finish clearing the table from dinner. While in the kitchen briefly gulping some water before I head to the bathroom, J starts wandering around. I see what I had previously believed to be marker and then ask him to stop for a second and come to me...it looks too smeary to be marker. I immediately gasp and yell that J has poop all over him and for him to stop running around and go back to the bathroom. My mom doesn't believe it at first but soon realizes I was indeed correct after she examines him more closely. I run to the bathroom, muttering "oh no" repeatedly as I go, and find a spot of diarrhea with the slightest smudge through it. So, J is forced into the bathtub promptly and gets a thorough rinse off. Then, both boys get their bath. Shortly after, NS arrives.

We finally get the boys to bed (taking extra time because they were coloring while mom and her boyfriend were noisily putting a mirror up on the wall that is shared by the living room and the boys' room). I walk into my bathroom to clean their toothbrushes and wonder why it smells so bad still since I had sprayed air-freshener after the last time...until I look down at the floor. I walk out of the bathroom saying, "She struck again!". My mom sighs with exasperation and asks that I just put it in a plastic bag and stick it out on the balcony as I am grabbing the paper towels for the zillionth time in several days. I clean up the mess and then head to the kitchen to grab my water before going to sit down and relax for the evening. Before I can even move one foot to leave the kitchen, my Big Dog manages to plant his foot directly on the edge of a dog bowl and sends dog food sprawling across the kitchen floor. I say something about the dogs being determined to give me something to clean up every moment I have a free second while I pour the swept-up food into the garbage. Just as those words leave my mouth and enter the air, my Little Dog squats on the kitchen floor and pees. At that moment, I begin laughing. I could have cried or maybe screamed (as my mother nearly did), but I just had to laugh. As I sat on the floor soaking up the yellow pool with paper towels, I actually doubled over with laughter...I was quite hysterical at that point. While standing in the bitter cold (to me, it is bitter cold...I don't care how much colder it is elsewhere) waiting for the dogs to finish whatever business they had left to do, NS looks at me, rubs my shoulder, and says, "Rough day?"...to which I could only respond with more laughter and a defeated shake of my head.

Even though J and all three dogs managed to keep me busy cleaning up messes for a couple hours, the rest of the evening was uneventful...thank goodness;>