Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Well, there you go...

I've spent too much time today thinking about what I'd like to post. I just ended a telephone conversation with IFKAMH that just gave it to me.

Since our custody agreement is technically "joint" rather than "sole" as it appears to be, I need him to sign and have notarized a document of consent for me to obtain passports for M and J. The reason for the passports is to make our trip to Whistler, B.C., Canada in LESS.THAN.TWO.MONTHS as easy as possible. So, I needed to get his current address to send the forms to him. After giving me his address, he proceeds to ask if I would mind if he claimed one of the boys on his tax return. I responded first with a simple "no", to which he asked why. Besides what would seem to be the obvious reason that he is not actually a care-provider of theirs and they are not just walking, breathing tax write-offs, I explained the irrefutable logistics of my answer: he does not supply more than half of their expenses.

In order to claim someone as a dependent, you must provide more than 50% of their financial expenses. The minimum child support amount that is paid to me still leaves me $100 short every week for daycare tuition, so that leaves me to pay the remainder as well as all of their food, clothing, shelter, and miscellaneous expenses. Even though they are on his medical insurance with his employer, it is a lesser cost to him than it would be if they were on mine, and I'm still the one that covers the co-payments and medicines and the charges that his insurance hasn't paid for, which as far as I can tell is all of them (hopefully that's just an error, though, and I can get reimbursed). All of those details are what I told him when he asked about it being 40%...not even close.

He said we should work something out. I asked if he was going to be supplying more money. No, he's not. Then, there isn't anything to work out. He makes more money than I do yet shoulders less of the burden from child-rearing expenses than I do; I fail to comprehend how there's a compromise in which I don't claim them as my dependents come tax time when they are, in fact, my dependents.

5 comments:

Jan B said...

Stand up for yourself and stick to your guns. My ex "made" me give him the deductions at our initial court hearing and my own attorney told me to sign an IRS form giving them up "for all future years". He got more in deductions then I ever got in child support. Talk about a cagey move.

Jonathan said...

Feel free to call him anything you like from me. Here's us in the middle of trying to adopt to give some kids a second chance, and there's him trying to use kids to make money for himself...

Fringes said...

I'm here reading and listening in support. We are in the same boat it seems. I think we're the same person. Did I already tell you that?

Glass Slipper said...

I read through the passport paperwork for my son a few weeks ago. Bascially I found a loophole to have the father sign the papers. If you can say that you don't know where he is, and you cna't get in touch with him, have someone notorize the form, then you don't need him.

Here is the link to the State department where it talks about that.

http://travel.state.gov/passport/forms/ds3053/ds3053_846.html

Celebrate Woo-Woo said...

glass slipper - I did see that loophole, and I'll consider it if I don't get the papers back promptly because I sent them Express Mail with a pre-paid Express Mail return envelope.