Monday, October 30, 2006

I used to get an allowance for this stuff...

Yesterday, after NS left to finish moving out of his old place, I mustered the resolve to clear out some more boxes...yes, I'm still unpacking. It's not weird to take 6 months to unpack, is it? I hope not because I might be able to finish just under that.

When he calls and finds out what I've been doing, he wonders why I only do this stuff when he's not there. While he was on duty Friday, I finally folded the few loads of laundry that had been done last weekend, and now, I'm unpacking stuff.

I figured out that it isn't that he makes me lazy as he suggested. Laziness overcomes me when he's not there, too, so it definitely isn't a result of his presence. I hate wasting precious time doing this stuff, though, when other people are around.

My house in FL was usually a virtual disaster because I'd rather spend my time with my children. While that is still sometimes true, they don't enjoy me as much as they used to, so the value of my not doing housekeeping tasks to hang with them is lost more often than not as I'm usually the mediator or the mess-preventer (trying to be anyhow). Now, if NS is home, then I can easily justify not doing laundry and dishes and unpacking (which usually just creates random piles of clutter because I can't find a place for everything that gets unpacked from a box but can get a general idea of where I want it to go or with what other unpacked clutter it should go) as wanting to spend the time relaxing with him.

Also, I despise squandering my weekends doing these things, but that is the only time I can really do them. I used to try to clean and pick up while the boys were sleeping at night or napping on the weekends (ha HA HHHHAAA...I know there used to be times that they did this regularly). The weeknight opportunities have become too risky since they don't always sleep in their room anymore. J will every once in a while, but I cannot recall the last night that M didn't sleep on the floor outside my bedroom door. The apartment is set up so that all front lighting floods the back as well, and I'd be pissed if someone was doing that crap while I was trying to sleep, so I refrain from doing it to him.

Basically, I do not enjoy cleaning or maintaining cleanliness. I absolutely love living in clean and tidy places, which is why I should enlist the services of a maid, I think, but I, of course, feel the need to have some type of order to my home before allowing some stranger to set foot in it. I've pondered this outsider cleaning idea before and wondered what I would want done only once a week or every other week.

Although I don't mind dusting, I rarely do it anymore because I'm stuck doing the other chore that I've hated for years but is far more important to me. Back in the days of high school, when my mom and I lived by ourselves, we had a fantastic cleaning arrangement. She hated dusting; I thought it was great. I hated vacuuming; she did not. We covered what the other hated and lived blissfully. Hmmm...maybe I can form this deal once again with NS;>

Bathrooms. If I never have to use bathroom cleaning supplies or hover my face over a toilet rim speckled with hair or urine (thankfully, NS has decent aim) or God knows what I can't see with my eyes, then I think that would make me quite happy.

I doubt paying someone to clean my bathrooms will be worth it to my finances right now, and I don't know what else I'd be willing to let go of. Laundry and dishes have to be done too often.

So, I guess I'll just have to get over it and try to remember how much nicer it is to come home to a dining table rather than an elevated collection of pictures and tools and clothes, to a floor rather than an obstacle course of toys and crayons and shoes and boxes and bags and M's bedding, to a kitchen counter rather than a storage shelf of boxes and pens and appliances...and lest I forget how much easier it is to get dressed when I actually know where all my clothing is rather than narrowing it down to a bag by the door or a plastic tub by the couch if I can't find it in my closet and can't remember having worn it recently for it to be in the hamper.

1 comment:

Jonathan said...

I spend my life wandering around behind my better half, in a continual act of picking things up, putting things away, and wondering how on earth she manages to make such a damn mess... you could probably get a forensics team in and reconstruct her whole day by following the trail around the house.