Tuesday, February 28, 2006

The latest...

So, the good news I've been waiting to share is job-related. I am expecting an offer from the company I interviewed with for an instructional designer/technical writer position. They really like me and want me to start soon, but the offer letter comes through the H.R. department, who is apparently taking some extra time to process everything. The manager has stayed in contact with me during this time to let me know that they have not changed their mind and that I don't need to continue job-hunting (unless I want to). So, I'm very anxious to know the details of the offer because this seems to be a "real" job, and my research found a rather nice salary range for those job titles;>

NS and I went to see J Medicine Hat with a lot of people he works with and their significant (and in some cases, not so significant) others on Friday. There were a total of 18 in our group...about half were drunk before the show, which almost got them kicked out within the first half hour of the two hour show. We had originally thought the comedian was David Allen Grier of In Living Color fame, but that was another weekend. NS was a bit hesitant about this guy because he is a comedian/hypnotist. The show was awesome, and yes, I believe they were really hypnotized. One thing I found surprising is that I never really thought I'd be the type to fall under hypnosis, but I guess I could...very easily, I might add. He invited everyone to try it out by staring at the flames from the candles on our tables while the people on stage stared at a light on the stage floor. Apparently, you just need to be able to focus well in order to be hypnotized, and I have a great ability to focus despite distractions, so I started falling asleep pretty quickly...long before he instructed us to close our eyes, my head was nearly detached from my neck from falling so far forward. The weird thing is that I was completely aware of everything but just didn't care to (or possibly couldn't) make it stop, which is exactly what the hypno guy said would happen. I knew my eyes were closing, I felt my head falling forward, but it still happened. Apparently, one of the assistants was going to attempt to get me on stage but knocked the leg of the guy next to me (waking him up) and moved my purse (which had some dangling fobs, which made some noise), and I woke up. I am very glad not to have been pulled to the stage because I am positive that I would have been embarrassed by what I would have done. There were 5 women and 1 man that ended up staying on stage. The last two bits stood out the most to me. He had them pretend to be in a rock band. One girl was the singer, another was a drummer, another was a keyboard player whose keyboard had a special vibrator positioned between her thighs and got stronger the more she played, the last two girls were lesbian guitar players (one of these girls was an actual lesbian), and the man was an exotic dancer. The lesbian guitar players danced suggestively and grabbed each other during the song. The male exotic dancer was the best part of this bit, though. He was told to be a straight dancer until he heard the hypnotist say "nags head" and then he would be a gay dancer. Once he was a gay dancer, he would see a guy in the front row of the audience and think he was the hottest thing ever and try his very best to entice him. The poor guy was giving the guy in the audience a lap dance and whispered in his ear that he wanted to suck his dick...priceless;> The last bit was a spelling bee, in which they were all 14 year-olds. The premise was that he would give them a word to spell but they would spell their own word, which would be completely inappropriate and of a sexual nature. The first girl spelled "fellatio". When told to use it in a sentence for bonus points, she said she didn't know how. She was told to say "I suck good dick" as her sentence, and she shouted it. The next girl came up to the mic giggling because the girl before her said "dick" and then spelled "erection" for her word. Other than her truly convincing 14 year-old immature attitude, her spelling bee appearance was not as entertaining as the others. The male spelled "pussy"...shocker! The next girl spelled "penis" and said she likes big penises. Next was "blowjob" with a sentence about liking to give them. Finally, the lesbian...she spells "head". When prompted to use this word in a sentence (with a disappointed look on the hypnotist's face...I'm pretty sure his method was to give a word with the same beginning letter as what he was hoping they would spell, and her word began with a "c", but I don't think she would have been able to spell "cunnilingus", especially since she was playing a 14 year-old), she said, "Can some bitch give me some head?!?" It was classic. The reason I believe that these people really had no clue what they were doing comes from our standing behind the lesbian and her girlfriend as we left. This chic was totally outrageous with her rather butch lesbianess on stage, but while she was leaving with her girlfriend and their friends were laughing about the show, she meekly asks her girlfriend if she's in trouble and if she did something wrong. It was really cute;> So, if you ever have a chance to see this guy, go...you will have fun.

NS is taking M, J, and me to the circus this Saturday. I'm so excited. I haven't been to a circus in years, and I really wanted to when they were in town in FL but didn't get to go then. This will be a first for M and J, and I can't wait to see their reactions. J knows what an elephant is (M probably does, too, he's just not as vocally expressive as J)...he says elephant when he sees a picture of one, so it should be really fun for them to see those animals in person, especially since NS decided to wait for this Saturday as opposed to last since we could get really close seats this weekend;>

On a side note, I'm not certain about my getting a second Valentine's gift. I haven't gotten it, and he hasn't mentioned it since that night. I'm not about to bring it up, though, because I'm not greedy, and I am perfectly pleased with my home-cooked meal and rum cakes;>

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