Sunday, February 19, 2006

Getting settled...

We moved over a week ago now and are starting to get pretty settled, I guess. Mom still has quite a bit of clothing to put away, but we've unpacked a lot of stuff and found room for it all, so we're doing really well;>

J is well now, too. Started feeling better the night that we went to the doctor, actually. As for anyone that thinks my children get sick often...well, there are two of them to catch each other's germs and pass them back and forth, and they do attend a large daycare center where germs are rampant despite the best efforts to keep things sanitized. My thoughts on the subject are: all of their illnesses are minor, for which I am truly grateful, and they will be walking walls of immunity by the time they start real school;> I was never sick as a child, but I catch almost every cold there is to be had as an adult, so if they can get all their illnesses out of the way as children, I think they'll be better off for it.

IFKAMH is still of the mindset that he can win my love and trust back...not sure why he believes this except that he still lives in a world of his own. I have told him repeatedly not to count on us getting back together. If he wants to move closer to the boys and actually be a father to them, then I will support that, and I can't stop him from doing whatever it is that he thinks will win me back, but I don't think he should be shocked if it doesn't work. Unfortunately for him, I think he will be shocked and disappointed...and I'm afraid he will be going for all or nothing concerning me and the boys, meaning if he doesn't get all of us back in his life, then he will choose to have none of us. I guess that won't be all that different for M and J at this point, but I would really like to prevent him from re-entering their lives just to abandon them again if that is what he will do once he realizes that I will not take him back...I just wish I could figure out how to determine if that will be his reaction.

NS cooked lasagna and lemon-butter green beans with almonds for me on Valentine's Day. It was quite good, even though the noodles he bought were a different kind (that supposedly didn't need to be cooked prior to baking) and didn't fully cook that night. The leftovers have been fantastic, though, since the microwave takes care of those noodles pronto;> There was an incident with him leaving his checkcard in an ATM last weekend that prevented the orders of my gifts from processing in time for the actual day, so I got one of them Friday (he told me there were two companies that he placed orders with for my gifts, so I'm guessing there is still something else on it's way). This gift was a variety of three (coconut, orange, and key lime) Tortuga Rum Cakes.
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This was especially thoughtful because I got him a small key lime one while I was in FL for the divorce, so he knew I loved them and realizes how much I miss FL sometimes;> After much procrastination and pondering, I got him a present on Valentine's Day. After wandering the stores in the mall without a clue what I wanted to get or what I felt would be appropriate besides a candle (but wasn't too impressed by any I found at the mall and time was running out), I decided to just pick out a card first. GA Girl helped me decide to go with my first instinct on the cards and make a gift out of it;>

Outside of the card: Sure, I'll be your Valentine. You don't have to butter me up...
Inside: Massage oil or whipped cream will do just fine.
So, NS received a dark square plate with a deep red candle encased with bamboo pieces, massage oil, and a can of Reddi Wip whipped cream;> All wrapped in red tissue paper and tied with a Happy Valentine's Day balloon and a tiny stuffed monkey (he loves monkeys, so I didn't just pull that one out of the air).

It was a nice evening, and I was very please to find that we were on exactly the same page for the signing of the cards...we both signed a simple "happy valentine's day" with our name. The card he picked for me was a bit more sentimental than the one I picked for him, but still no sappy poems or "I love you"s, so it was absolutely perfect;>

Oh, and he is definitely still a sweetie...he's spent a couple nights at the new place with me...in the living room, on an air mattress, with no sex...if that isn't sweetness, then I'm afraid I don't know what is;>

Finally, the man my mom left (I hesitate to use the term stepdad still, but he isn't officially an ex yet) seems to be a bit mentally challenged. One day, he is just upset about the situation and is trying to be somewhat civil and understanding about it all and the next day, he'll be stalking my mom and telling her he's going to do whatever he can to make her life hell. I don't know how someone can go from one of day to the next and completely change his approach like that. An example: He tells my mom that he wants her two dogs back or else he's going to tell the rental office how many there are so we'll get in trouble, if not evicted. The next day, he demands she take them back, and when she says she can't because he'll use it against her, he demands she bring dog food for them or else he's going to tie them to the railing outside our apartment the next morning (by the way, he has two dogs of his own, so there was no lack of dog food at the house). That was Friday; needless to say, my mom and I dropped off the food because we are not cruel to animals. Yesterday, he drops off bottled water, laundry detergent, and other supplies outside our door along with some flowers for my mom. I don't understand how his mind shifts from ruining her life one day to helping her out the next...it simply baffles me.

3 comments:

GA girl said...

Holy crap those things are expensive. Hope they are REAL tasty.

Danielle said...

Glad your back and the boys are feeling better!!! Never seen those kind of cakes before but they look good. Sound slike you had a nice Valentines day!!!! and dude sounds scary, moms ex!!! Tell her to be careful!

Celebrate Woo-Woo said...

I couldn't believe how expensive they were either. The three that he got were a gift set that was $50, but before I saw that, I was started to think he was crazy and spent $75 on cake;> They are very tasty, though. I finished the coconut yesterday and opened the orange last night. Orange one doesn't have as strong a rum flavor as the coconut, but is still awesome;>