Tuesday, December 06, 2005

He can't really be that stupid...yeah, I guess he can

IFKAMH flew in today for a job interview. He called from Atlanta and asked if I was going to pick him up or if he'd need to rent a car. I said I didn't have enough gas to go to the airport nor enough money to get enough gas, so he'd better rent the car. He was expecting me to be excited for him to be here and to want to see him...not quite. I told him that I wasn't sure I wanted to see him while he was here. Besides...I'd made plans to hang out with Navy sweetie this afternoon since he'd get off work early after having had duty yesterday. So, he starts calling me around 1230 when he arrives at the airport. I don't answer since I'm getting ready to go meet Navy sweetie. I call him back around 130 to tell him that I wouldn't have time to meet him before his interview since I've got errands to run for my mom. He asked if we could meet afterwards. I simply told him to call me then, and I'd let him know. He called a few times while I was with Navy sweetie, and then my phone started dying, so I turned it off. So, I managed to avoid him. We certainly had an interesting conversation tonight (while he's stuck here because of problems with the plane). He really doesn't get it. He seems to believe that I could just forgive what happened and be happy that he wants to work things out now. I told him he's just going to have to work very hard at proving he's the kind of man I'd like to be married to, and if my feelings for him change as a result, then we can work things out, but that will be an unlikely possibility in my mind. So, I said some things that he considered to be harsh, but they are only the truth and what I really feel. I don't imagine that I could ever be happily married to him again. I think I would always be questioning things, and I don't want to live like that, which is why it is very unlikely he could ever do anything that would make me think it's a good idea to take him back. He even begged me not to make this the biggest mistake of his life. I explained that I haven't done anything to him...everything that has happened between us the past 8 months and everything I feel about him now is a result of his actions. He seems to believe in his warped mind that I still love him and that I don't think I can find someone better. He even tried to convince me I should say that I don't want to be with someone else...yeah, right. I would love to be with someone else that wouldn't even contemplate doing the things he's done to me and his children.

Anyway, IFKAMH got the job, so I guess he will be moving here after he gets a new car and a place to live.

Navy sweetie and I had an even more enjoyable time this afternoon (for me anyhow...I know he was tired afterwards, which I think is a good thing for a guy;>) and will be exchanging Christmas gifts this year...I think I have a potential boyfriend in him (never would've imagined);>


Danielle said...

congrats to IFKAMH for getting the job! Gurl glad you are having fun!

I, Gladiator said...

Woo-Woo...I am really excited for you and what is coming into your life...I was reading your blog when you were in Florida and IFKAMH was acting a fool.

I find myself hoping and wishing that things will work out for you and IFKAMH. He is, afterall, the father of your children and in the end we are all human and make mistakes that hurt people close to us. Maybe while IFKAMH figures out how to win your trust and love, you can enjoy time with Navy boy. Maybe if IFKAMH stands by you and takes care of the boys and helps you financially while you are out in the dating world it will give you a chance to see if he really has a heart.

I certainly hope so. My fingers are crossed.

GA girl said...

You take the ass back, and I will hurt you. DON'T DO IT!!!!!

Eunice said...

Here is why he is clearly an idiot. He is begging you not to make this the biggest mistake of his life? Uhm, last I checked, he's the one that made the decision to run out on you. You are so much better off without him. The only good thing that will come of him living there is that hopefully he will be man enough to share some of the burden of raising the boys.

Danielle said...

morning gurl!! just checking in, I am partying in the office, stringing lights and listening to xmas music!!! have a great day!

Buck Rogers said...

step away from IFKAMH...he doedsn't deserve you. At like the YMCA and be "In the Navy" boy